Schrödinger's Cat

The door was locked again. There was no light to see, but I knew the door was locked. They always locked the door.

They left me food this time, but I didn’t trust the food. The food was their trap. They wanted to me behave the way they thought I should. Eat the food they thought was right for me. Leave the room when they gave me permission. Everything was by their schedule and their rules. It was all a trap.

I would not be a part of their trap.

I wondered how long it would be before they opened the door this time. It didn’t matter though. They would never let me be free.

I could hear them outside the door. They were arguing again. They argued a lot. Sometimes about me. Sometimes about other things. I could hear them well enough most times, but this time I moved closer to the door to hear.

“I’m telling you, she’s not in there anymore,” one of them said.

Idiot. Of course I was in here. They had locked me in. What did they think? That I would just walk through the door?

“Of course she is in there. The door is locked,” said the other.

Well at least he had some sense. I sat there for a while listening to them debate. They said the only way to prove it was to open the door and they would need to get the key. I heard them walk away.

I always enjoyed when they weren’t arguing outside the door. That was when the silence could descend. Beyond the silence was the music. They told me there was no music, but I knew better. I could hear the music.

The music was the most glorious sound I had ever heard. It was a mixture of bells and laughter and joy. It made me want to dance every time it started but I was afraid to dance. I was afraid that if I danced they would say that it was just something else wrong with me. It would give them yet another reason to keep me locked in this room.

This time I waited in the silence hoping the music would come before they returned. I yearned for the music as much as I yearned to be free of this room. Sometimes I wanted the music more than I wanted my freedom. The music was special, and I somehow knew that if I was free of this room, the music would never come again.

The music came. It started out so soft, like a gentle breeze and then built to a bubbling brook. The music was like nature come to me in my dark prison. This time as the music built from a bubbling brook to the power of crashing waves, I began to dance.

It felt glorious to dance. To twirl and move and become one with the music. It felt as though I could dance right past that door and into freedom. I continued to twirl around the room, and this time as I came to the door, it was as if it wasn’t even there. I went right through it and saw the rooms beyond, but the music continued and I continued to dance with it.

It was glorious this freedom. It was better than any freedom I had before they locked me in that room. I could dance and move and be free as I had never been before. I even danced right past the men as they were returning to the room with the key.

NO!

They couldn’t open the door. If they opened the door the music would end, and I would be back in their trap. I tried to stop them. I tried to get their attention, but in my freedom they could not see me. They didn’t understand this freedom and wouldn’t recognize it.

I had to stop them. I didn’t want to go back to the trap, but there was nothing I could do. They were already turning the key in the lock.

As they opened the door, the music stopped and my freedom ended. I was back in their trap and they could see me there.